I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
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The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
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Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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