I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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