Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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