I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
i think i just lost a toe
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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