You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I puked a lego.
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Randomize