I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
