Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize