party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
