forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Randomize
