I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
