Christians are straight up FREAKS
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show