i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.