Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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