who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
So. Much. Porn.
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