VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
