No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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