You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
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