I think my vagina is haunted
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
pop tarts are not kleenex
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize