So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
