i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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