Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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