Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
