I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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