is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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