come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
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