People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
