Your face is a jimmy john
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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