Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
