Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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