I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize