Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.