you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK