the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
