its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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