wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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