Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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