the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
so much tequila, so little girl.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.