So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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