the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
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