She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
