just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Randomize