Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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