just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Randomize