I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize
