How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
