One girl and one boy is just not enough.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
