Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize