You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
i just google imaged poop.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
