How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
