defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
