Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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