operation harelip BJ is a go
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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