I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
