Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Randomize
